Jane Austen had the right idea: have a man fall in love with you, without holding hands or sharing a kiss. Wouldn’t that just be the challenge of all challenges, to have a man declare his love without laying a hand on you?
Now please understand, dear reader, that I am not making a case for toying with a man’s affections. Not really. Maybe a little…anyway, just like the age-old question of can men and women just be friends, can they fall in love without physical contact?
I think it’s possible; I mean, look at the Duggers – those girls were only allowed a quick “side” hug with their beaus before the wedding day. And the boys seem to be fine young men…well, except that one brother, but let’s not get into that…
I believe it is possible…I mean, we hear about people meeting their soulmate on sites like Match.com or e-Harmony…and out of all those couples, how many actually make it?
I have no answers, so don’t look at me.
As we look at “what was then,” how does it compare to “now?” Marriages back in the old days were usually ones of advantage, or if it was nobility, to strengthen a family’s bloodline. It’s still done today, or at least back in the 1970’s – I went to high school with a beautiful young lady who had an arranged marriage, and last I heard, they were still together. She met him three times before their wedding date. No, her family didn’t belong to some religious cult; her father was Egyptian, her mother was French, and this is what they decided for her. I guess she could have said no, but who knows what the ramifications would have been?
Anyway, back to Jane… people would make plans to spend a week at someone’s house, usually for a party or some sort of gathering. You attended, you met someone whose background was “appropriate” and exchanged letters….then if all went according to plan, you got married, after seeing each other a few times in the company of others. It was their version of speed dating.
All in all…maybe not such a bad thing? No matter how revealing or hot and heavy the letters were, they still had tons to discover about each other. And the divorce rate was quite low, as it was frowned upon greatly, unless you were a man whose wife cheated openly (except for mistresses of Kings, but that’s another story.)
I would like to hear your thoughts, dear readers…is this something that could work today?